Birth of a Family
by TwoVirgosGals
Summary: Ever wonder how Frank took the news of Jeremy's coming...or what made Denise's doctors say she couldn't have more children...find out inside. Reviews appreciated! Completed!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Welcome to Birth of a Family. This piece is an exploration into the early marriage of Densie and Frank Sherwood, exploring exactly how they went from a couple to a family. All opinions shared within are those of the characters as the author/authors see fit, they do not necessarily reflect any personal views. For entertainment purposed only. Enjoy!**

She threw up again. He heard her. Twenty one year old Frank Sherwood stumbled out of bed exhausted, back throbbing from landing sideways on his jump. He went to his young wife and knelt behind her. "All right Dee, enough is enough. I'm calling my Mom and she'd taking you to see the doc, no more excuses." He rubbed her back as she continued to get sick.

"I know what it is Frank," she sighed. "All of this is just too much; I'm trying to adjust...my stomach always gets upset when we change posts, ask my mother."

"No, Denise, we've been her two months, this is ridiculous. You might be real sick, baby and I can't concentrate on training for deployment worrying about you. You are going to the doctor, conversation over!"

Denise tried to protest but the feeble attempt was thwarted by another bout of nausea.

As Frank walked out the door Denise laid on the couch, garbage can by her head weak tea on the coffee table and dread in her soul. Her mother in law was coming too help? That was an oxymoron if she ever heard one!

As she lay there she began to wonder if she could be pregnant or just ill from the relocation, either way life is miserable. Now Liz was coming, she was domineering and bossy, just like Frank's dad.

She raised her eyes to the wall clock - he'd been gone 20 minutes. It took 30 to get to the airport 10-15 minutes to connect with mom and another 30 back home. Denise swallowed painfully, "Please God let her be gentle." She weakly reached for the cup of tea and sipped, then put her head down and fell asleep.

By the time Frank got back the tea was out of her stomach and on the floor, she was laying with her arm over her eyes. Frank went into protective mode immediately. "Denise! Mom, you see. She's so sick. What's wrong?" Frank turned into a little boy around his mother.

His mom felt Denise's head and looks at her pale face. She didn't seem to have a fever but she was dehydrating. "She needs to go to the emergency room now, she shouldn't wait to see a doctor later."

"Let me clean up this mess while you get her ready. Now Frank," Liz ordered.

Frank ran to the bedroom and brought back a clean house dress. He helped Denise sit up and change while his mom cleaned up the floor. He carefully picked Denise up and carried her to his truck while hie his mother grabbed plastic bags and towels just in case they were needed during the short trip.

She cried when he laid her down in the backseat. She didn't want to be out of his arms, she didn't want him to leave her. But as soon as she was delivered to the ER he left her with his mother to go to work. Thank Heavens the older Mrs. Sherwood, was a connected and pushy Army wife.

"My daughter-in-law is very ill she needs your help now!" she ordered. "She's been ill for days."

The triage nurse looked at Denise and saw how bad she was; pale, dehydrated, and listless. She quickly got a wheelchair and pushed Denise towards the back, with Mrs. Sherwood following behind.

They drew her blood and ran tests, started fluids, and offered sips of water. "I want Frank here," she whispered not even opening her eyes. "I want my husband."

Liz Sherwood looked at her daughter- in- law. "Frank has to work dear. I'm here, now just relax we'll know soon what is wrong."

Denise turned her head away as tears slid down into her hair. "I'm here in the hospital with Liz when I need my husband," she thought miserably.

Out on the training field Frank was having a hard time concentrating. If he was on live fire he'd be dead by now. As they took a break his squad leader came to him, "What's going on Sherwood? You're head is up your behind man."

Frank stood at attention, "No excuse, Sergeant!" he replied looking at a point over the man's shoulder.

The squad leader wiped his forehead. "Get your act together or you'll do double duty! Understand?"

Frank quickly acknowledged and watched his leader walk away. His stomach was rolling with worry about his wife. But mom was here and he had no choice in the matter.

Still half an hour later he made another mistake, it was so unlike him to do that, his leader questioned him again, "I don't want to discipline Sherwood. I'll give you one more chance to tell me the truth."

Frank was embarrassed, soldiers didn't lose their focus, if he wanted to be an officer and make a life for Denise he had to concentrate. "It's my wife," he admitted. "She's at the ER right now with my mother, first time I've ever seen her sick."

The leader looked at him and sighed "Okay, Sherwood get yourself over to the ER before you kill yourself or someone else. But tomorrow you better be up to snuff no excuss. Dismissed!" Frank looked at him bug eyed and hurried to his car before his sergeant changed his mind.

He arrived just as Denise was getting sent home. "Don't tell him Liz, please," she begged. "I want to tell him myself." They'd hydrated her and given her medication to help ease the severity of her nausea. "Speak of the Devil," Liz said nodding t her son running to his bride. She admitted only to herself how jealous she was of them, of their love.

As Frank ran up to the ER porch he saw Denise and his mom. "Hey, you're going home! Everything okay?"

Denise smiled at him. "I'm okay, they hydrated me and gave me meds, really I feel better," Denise assured him.

" I called a cab let me tell the nurse to cancel," Liz said then quickly walked back in thru the doors.

Frank squatted down and looked into Denise's eyes. "You really okay? What is wrong?"

Denise caught his hand and held it to her chest uttering the words she was still struggling to believe herself. "I'm pregnant."


	2. Chapter 2

Denise didn't know what she expected but the reaction he gave her was not it. "Damn it!" he swore. "How in the Hell...We were careful!"

All the good feelings she had left her and she wanted to cry. He wasn't happy, he even seemed put out. Why did we marry if not to have a child? As Liz walked out she saw Frank red in the face and mad with Denise sitting ramrod straight in the wheelchair.

"Denise?" There were more words in her question than she actually spoke. Frank as still mid rant, "We said we'd...I cannot believe this!"

Liz glared at her son, "Frank Stanton Sherwood, you settle down and act your age! This is not the place for this conversation, get the truck please. Denise needs to lie down and get her rest. And you and I will have a talk."

Frank looked at his mother and muttered under his breath and ran to get the truck. Liz looked at Denise. "It'll be ok honey they always act like that. He'll come around and he will hover so much you will scream."

Denise sniffed and wiped at her eyes Frank wasn't happy but she was and she wanted her baby.

Frank drove up and parked. As he jumped out his mom helped Denise into the back seat and he looked at Liz as she closed the door. "Son, you better check that attitude at the door for Denise's sake. The next few weeks or months will be rough and you better step up to the plate."

"You sound like dad."

Liz looked at him as she closed the door. "I should we've been married long enough."

"We can't...afford a baby," he told her. "We don't have enough money for us and now this little baby that's going to need all kinds of stuff from me. We were careful, we both said no kids until we've been married a bit and here it is two months and she's pregnant already!"

Liz knew now what was wrong with her baby, he was scared. Frank didn't have the best relationship with his father, none of their boys did; it was cold and distant. Denise was warm and loving; their baby would expect more than Frank knew how to give.

"Well everything will work out. If need be I can send you some money, your father doesn't need to know. I'm sure Denise has some friends that can give her a baby shower and some handy gifts."

Frank's grip on the steering wheel tightened "I don't know how to be a father."

Liz patted his hand. "Son no man does, it's trial and error but with Denise by your side I have faith."

As they drove home Denise sat back watching the scenery fly by, wallowing in her misery and trying not to cry and piss Frank off even more.

When they got home he got out and went around to help Denise out of the car himself. He held her close to his chest and whispered "I'm sorry." He kissed her head and started up the few short steps. Liz stayed back, they needed time alone.

"I want you to lie down now," he told Denise leading her to their room. "Your back and legs must be sore; I'll get some more pillows..." Frank showed his ignorance of a pregnancy just then and Denise laughed. "Not for a few more months, if you even let me keep the baby."

Frank looked at her in shock. "What did you say? Let you keep the baby- why would you say that?"

She did not look him in the eye. "If you don't want it...then I don't...want it to..." She was having a hard time breathing around her tears. "To know it's not loved by its Daddy."

Frank sat on the bed feeling totally drained. He rubbed his head. "Dee, I want the baby but it's so soon we aren't prepared I'm not ready but you are pregnant and we have no choice." Denise went to speak but he held up his hand. "Abortion is out of the question just give me time to adjust I will come around." He smiled at her and kissed her nose. "Now get some sleep while I get mom settled."

Denise lay back and watched him leave, she had some hope that Frank would come around. She turned on her side and gave it to her exhaustion.

Over the next couple of days Frank slowly started to adjust to the idea of being a daddy. He went to the baby shop while Denise was asleep one Sunday and couldn't resist what he saw, a tiny camo sleeper with the words "Daddy's Little Soldier."

He showed it to Liz first and she started to laugh "She'll love it!" As Frank took out all the stuff he bought Denise walked out of the bedroom. "Hey what are you doing?"

Frank stepped back holding the sleeper out smiling big."Oh my goodness, how cute! Did you buy it Frank?"

Frank nodded, "Couldn't resist."

Liz smiled they were definitely getting better.

"Good because I have to show you this!" she beamed and ran to the bedroom to catalog box where she had earmarked baby things. "Look at these, isn't it adorable!" There were pink and blue and green and yellow colors all over the book. Things had animals and bears and letters...Frank saw the prices in the hundreds for it.

Denise saw him drifting, "Frank, honey, please...let's not worry. Let's focus on being happy. I can make these things...we can pick out a pattern and I can sew...it's going to be okay." She reached over and held him. "It's going to be okay, sweetheart." Now it finally registered. He was afraid.

"Dee, we have to be practical now and not go crazy." He rubbed the back of his head. "This is real, we are having a baby, a little person, I'm going to be a Dad." He looked at Denise. She smiled; he was scared but couldn't show it.

Liz shook her head -just like his father, so much alike. She hoped he'd a better father to his son than the one he'd had.

Denise pulled back and caressed his cheek, "You're going to be the best Dad. It's going to be okay." She tried to soothe him and settle him down. "I have an idea; let's go for a little ride, if you're up to it."

Frank nodded and picked up Denise's hand and out the door they went, while Liz started dinner.


	3. Chapter 3

They sat by the water holding one another, Denise took his hand and put it on her still flat belly. "Tell me what you're so frightened of," she ventured.

He sighed heavily and rubbed her stomach with his hand. "Doing..." his voice caught. "Doing to this baby what..." It was too hard to talk about. He was battling tears at the thought of her finding out.

Denise looked at her husband. "Doing what Frank? Tell me...please."

Her eyes pleaded with him and she kept squeezing his hand in reassurance.

He tried to speak around the lump of emotion in his throat, "Nothing was easy at home Dee. Nothing was easy you knew that...my father set high standards and he expected us to carry them out. We did try, and everyone succeeded...everyone but me. I always failed him."

He had to stop and turn his face away, "I was so clumsy and stupid...I always made a mess of everything...he just ran out of patience with me, that's not anyone's fault but my own but still..." He was too ashamed to really tell her what had happened to him.

Denise pulled at his arm. "You didn't fail him or yourself. You are a good man a decent man. You won't be like him you'll be different I know you will. You will even work your way up the ladder and he won't be able to be anything but proud. Our baby will be proud, I am ." He turned and looked at her he loved her so much. He leaned over and kissed her tenderly.

"If I hit our baby Dee, I don't mean spank I mean hit...if I do...promise me you'll take the little one and go as far away as you can." The tears were running down his cheeks...her love and tenderness were more than he felt he deserved.

Denise was angry, what was he trying to tell her. It didn't matter, she'd deal with Liz at home. "I promise you that but I know I won't have to. I know I won't have to sweetheart. Let me prove it to you, drive to the hospital, I want to show you something."

They drove to the hospital and Denise whispered to an old friend of hers what she wanted to do. She led Frank to the nursery and sat him in the rocker. Before it registered what he was doing Denise placed a newborn girl in his arms, "I'm going to be volunteering here to get ready..." He didn't hear her, he was mesmerized by the little baby he held over his heart.

She watched as Frank visibly softened. What had happened in his youth to make him so afraid to be a father? She would prove to him he was different.

The tiny girl started to fuss and at first he froze, then he adjusted her little body and made a shooshing sound. She stretched and fell back to sleep. He looked up at Denise is awe, "When?" he asked. "When's it coming?"

"In about 7.5 months, we'll have our own. You see you real a natural."

"She's so tiny, ours will be this tiny too?" Denise nodded smiling at Frank.

He'd have been content to sit there all day and hold the baby girl but it was time for her to go to her Mommy and be fed. He'd changed having that newborn in his arms, he was now totally ready for this baby.

He smiled sadly as the nurse took the baby away, he took Denise's hand and they left the nursery to go home.

As they were driving home Frank looked at Denise. "Names we don't have a name."

Denise laughed she liked this Frank full of excitement about the baby.

"We have plenty of time," she told him. "We'll have the perfect name when the time is right.

They arrived home and shared a meal. As she and Liz cleaned the dishes Denise bit her lip and confronted her mother-in- law. "Elizabeth, I want to know why my husband was in tears today thinking that he might hurt our baby like his father hurt him. I think I am entitled to an explanation."

Liz bit her lip and dried her hands. She looked at her Denise. "My husband was a tough father and husband, everything had to be perfect or near perfect, it was hard for the boys especially Frank. He was for corporal punishment it made men out of boys."

Denise was shocked, "Did he hit you ?"

Liz nodded a couple of times. "He didn't beat me, just a slap now and then."

Denise shook her head. "You allowed that?"

"I did," she replied. "So did my mother...He's a good man and he loved us..."

Denise held up her hand. "He's a man that is not welcome here. It was more than corporal punishment; it had to be for Frank to be so upset!" Denise put her hands on her hip, "And if you condoned it, you are not welcome in my home again. How could you stand by and watch a man hurt a boy?"

Liz stood very straight. "What could I have done he was bigger than me, I didn't condone it. I couldn't stop him! My sons survived; they are good men!"

"And Frank is terrified to be a father! Don't you get it Liz!"

"Frank was slower than my other boys, his father had to be tougher..."

Denise was losing her temper, "Get your things and leave this house!" She was never aggressive except if someone hurt or upset her husband. "You should have protected him; he was your little boy, the baby! You were his Mommy, it makes me sick!" She was starting to get very upset.

Liz tried to soothe her but she continued, "You take them and you go as far and as fast as you can just like Frank asked me to do. That's what you do, Liz."

"I'm not like you Dee I had no career, I had 3 boys and nowhere to go. It's not like today, there weren't places to go. Besides he could find me and then the fighting would start."

"So you let him hurt your son!" Denise snapped. "No, I will not accept that. Get your things now and leave my house this minute. I can't even look at you."

She ran from the kitchen in tears, her hormones were raging and now she'd found out this horrible secret...Frank looked at his wife dashing past him then at his mother with tears in her own eyes.

"What the hell happened?" he asked.

"Frank, she confronted me about your father, and when I told her she told me to leave because I didn't stop him."

Frank turned ashen. "You told her? Mom how could you?"

"I'm sorry son, I'll leave, but she acted like…"

Frank caught her hand "No Mom stay. It wasn't your fault, you did what you could. Let me talk to Denise."

Liz nodded as she dabbed at her eyes.

Frank hated to see any woman cry, he held his mother tight. "I love you Mom. Denise doesn't take to my getting upset is all. You go and lie down in the guest room and I'll talk to her."

Frank went to his room where Denise was curled up crying. Her stomach hurt she was so upset.

He sat on the bed and pulled her gently into his arms. He rubbed her back "I didn't want you to find out. Mom did what she could." He kissed her head "I'd like mom to stay a few days more, okay?"

Denise looked at him, "I can't forgive her but I will tolerate her for you."

Frank hugged her, "Thank you, baby."

He got up to tell his mom to relax, "He is not welcome here, Frank. Not near you or my baby."

Frank nodded sadly and left to tell his mom.

Peace was restored to the Sherwood home and after another week Liz left to go back to her life. Frank continued to train long and hard for his deployment while Denise focused on becoming a mother. He belly grew and the more it did the more real it all seemed. Frank was home with her still through her fifth month, one evening he came home from training and literally collapsed onto the sofa.

Denise brought him a glass of ice tea and helped him with his boots. She sat next to him and asked him about his day.

Frank swallowed his tea and looked at her. "Dee I'm deploying in two weeks."

Denise looked at her hands "How long will you be gone?"

"I don't know," he replied. "Six months, maybe more. We knew it would happen and with things like they are now in the Middle East..." He reached for her.

Denise lay with him and hid her face in his chest, an action he learned early on meant she was upset, afraid or both. He hated that.

"I won't be here for the baby's birth and we haven't even picked out a name."

She held him tight scared that he wouldn't come home and never meet its Daddy.

"Well we have a lot to do before you leave," she replied gently.

"You'll be ok Dee"?

She nodded, "Women have been having babies since time began, often without their husbands. I'll be just fine."

Frank sighed and rubbed her back up and down. "What names do you like if it's a boy?"

"I like the name Jeremy and Thomas after my father. What if we have a girl. What do you like?"

"Something old fashioned, nothing trendy," he replied. "Margaret?"

Denise rubbed her belly "Margaret, that's nice. We need a middle name."

"I had a favorite aunt growing up, Margaret Mary. We all called her RaRa, but her actual name was Margaret Mary."

"I'm not too sure on Jeremy though," Frank replied. "Didn't you date a Jeremy somewhere along the line?"

"I like the name, the guy was a jerk. I still like the name -Jeremy Sherwood, sounds good and strong."

"All right," Frank agreed. "Jeremy Thomas for a boy and Margaret Mary for a girl."

Denise snuggled next to Frank happy their baby had a name and would be here soon. She dozed off on her husband's chest knowing in her heart Frank would come home to his child, that was just the way it was going to be.


	4. Chapter 4

Denise lay on the table watching as the doctor slid the transducer over and over her belly. This one was taking longer than usual. He watched the monitor then looked at her. "Mrs., Sherwood there's a problem the baby is in position but…"

Denise held her belly smearing the gel. "What's wrong?"

"The cord is hanging low and the uterine wall appears a bit abnormal. You may need a c section. "

"I want to deliver naturally," she said as if she never heard the technician. "I want to have my baby like..." She was getting upset, she needed her husband.

"Denise if you deliver naturally you may have a problem as well as the baby the cord is hanging low, it could get pinched off and if it does the baby could die."

Denise closed her eyes and thought. "I want Frank he'd tell me what to do."

The doctor sat in the chair and looked at Denise. "Think about your life and that baby, safety first. Where's your husband?"

Denise wiped her eyes. "Deployed for another couple of months."

"Okay, this is considered an emergency. We can try to have him contacted if you have any idea where he is. Would you like for us to try to reach him and you can talk it over together?"

She nodded, he had to come home, she needed him.

Denise gave the information to the doctor and his staff started working on locating Frank to no avail. Denise went home that night alone and afraid...that fear was nothing compared to what she felt when she woke from a restless sleep to a wet bed and blood on her sheets.

She managed to call 911 and get to the front door to unlock it when the bus squealed to a stop. They knocked and came thru the door to Denise sitting on the floor in a puddle of blood.

The rest of things were nothing but a blur. She didn't remember much of anything except crying in pain and futilely calling over and over again for her husband.

Frank's unit returned from a patrol...he was met with his CO's stone face. "Sgt. let's have a word, son." Son...not a good sign.

"Frank I got a call from the states your wife is having some problems with her pregnancy and her doctors would like you home. Your orders have been cut. The transport will be here in 1 hour get your things and be ready."

Frank bit his lip nodded, "Sir, yes sir." He turned quickly and ran to his tent.

As the OB checked Denise he cursed . "Get an OR ready; the cord is down she bleeding too much. We have no choice, they're both in danger. Any family here?"

The nruse quickly replied in the negative. The doctor ordered, "Get the Administrator to sign the consent and get her upstairs." He leaned over Denise. "Denise, you have to have surgery now." All she could do was look at him.

All she saw was the lights in the ceiling and the funny tiles then she blacked out.

The entire trip home Frank felt like getting sick. He was sick a few times, he'd later remember. His mother met him at the tarmac when he arrived three days after getting the news that Denise's pregnancy was now considered complicated. "Mom?" he asked running to her. "Mom? Is she all right? Did the baby come? Is the baby all right?" He was pale and breathless.

Liz walked with him to the car and got in. "The baby is here, a cute little boy 6lbs exactly and 20 inches long. He's okay, he's perfect in fact."

"Mom what about Dee?"

"Frank she had to have surgery, she was hemorrhaging and other problems. She's alive but very weak. She mostly sleeps."

Frank knew his mother was holding back. "Mom, what else? There is something else."

"The doctor said she can't have anymore babies she could die..I'm sorry son." Frank nodded and watched the scenery as his mother drove to the hospital.

"I want to tell her," he said as they went inside. "She wanted a big family, let me be the one to tell her when she's stronger." He didn't want to see his baby; he just wanted to see Denise.

When he saw her he felt weak himself. She was so pale, lying so still in the bed. She looked tiny in that hospital bed with tubes and wires on her. He went to her side and held her hand. "Denise...Dee, I'm here. I'm here baby."

Denise opened her eyes and smiled, "Frank." He held her hand and kissed her knuckles. "I'm here."

"Did you see him? Mom did they said he's pretty, looks like you."

"I didn't see him yet, I came right here. Mom said you were weak...I couldn't..." He kissed her hand again. "I couldn't not be with you when you need me Dee. I'm sorry."

"Orders always orders, you're here now maybe we can see him. Ask the nurse."

He nodded and got up to request their son. He didn't want to see this baby though, this baby make his wife too weak to sit up.

When the nurse came in pushing the isolette he was shocked. The tiny baby was so cute. The nurse told Frank to sit and put the baby in his arms. Denise smiled they were a family.

Frank looked down at his newborn son, "Hey Jeremy," he smiled. "I'm your Daddy. And that's your Mommy. We love you."

"Do you like him Frank?" Denise asked softly. "Is he what you wanted?"

Frank was beaming, this was his son. "Yeah, Dee, he is even more."

Frank silently counted his fingers and toes and his light brown hair and light brown eyes. He had his mom's eyes.

Denise was starting to fade out of him, but she did it with a smile. Jeremy let out a yell that shocked her father.

"What's the matter son? You hungry?" He looked up at Denise, but she was asleep.

He had his hands and legs flailing letting out a fuss that was to be reckoned with. Frank finally figured out what was wrong, the baby was wet...he'd never changed a diaper in his life.

He stood holding the squirming bundle and stuck his head out the door and called for a nurse who came running. She smiled and went to get a diaper and showed Frank how to change a newborn. Frank felt helpless Jeremy was just too small for his big hands.

"It's almost time for your son to eat. Would you like to feed him?"

Frank looked at the nurse bug eyed. "Me?"

"You. His momma won't be able to do this on her own," she said scaring him even more.

"I don't know how."

"You'll learn. Sit down, let me get the bottle."

Frank sat down in the chair holding Jeremy almost shaking-feeling he'd screw it up.

"Lift his back up a little higher on your arm," the nurse advised. "Slip the nipple in and let him suckle."

When Jeremy finally began to suck successfully Frank beamed like he invented something special and he did, a father and son special moment.

Frank next learned how to burp his son and even changed his diaper without getting watered. When Denise finally stirred again, it was to her husband and her son in the chair both sound asleep.

Denise sighed and stiffly turned on her side so she could relish this moment. Both had a smile on their faces. Jeremy looked like Frank a softer version.

Three days later she was discharged from the hospital. Her mom stayed to help while Liz returned home. After all, a new mother always wants her mom there in the beginning.

Denise was getting around slowly and enjoyed her time with Frank and the baby, her mom though was driving her crazy being a bit overbearing.

Frank was preparing to speak to his wife about it when things went from bad to worse. He came home from picking up a pizza to Denise on the living room floor in tears, Jeremy in his swing, screaming his lungs out, and his mother-in-law ordering, "Let him cry, he's not hungry or wet, just let him cry."

"What is going on in here?" Frank demanded. "Denise, are you all right honey?"

Frank walked in put the pizza down and helped Denise to the couch. He kissed her forehead, glared at his mother-in-law and picked up the baby cradling him to his chest. He gave him to his mother and turned to Kate.

"He'll never learn to soothe himself if you pick him up every time he cries," Kate snapped. "You're spoiling him!"

"Kate, thank you for coming and helping us with Jeremy, but it's time for you to leave."

"You can't spoil little babies!" cried Denise snuggling her little one to her bosom. Frank sat next to Denise and his son trying to comfort them both.

Jeremy settled down quickly, he just wanted to be held, his tummy hurt. Denise on the other hand only cried harder, she didn't want her mother to go, but she couldn't let her baby scream and cry. She gave the newborn to Frank and left the room, she was a horrible mother, he baby hated her, it was all going so wrong!"

After Kate left Frank thought things would settle down but Denise's mood swings got worse and she hardly ate. He didn't know what to do.

She'd care for the baby, she'd shelter him and love him, but she didn't care for herself. About three weeks after Jeremy came, he was awake, crying hard with gas, Denise was walking him, crying herself...Frank arrived home late from training and his heart broke. She was so lost...she really didn't know what to do for herself, neither did he. He could easily fix the baby's upset stomach, but it seemed when he did that only made Denise worse.

Still he had to do something, Denise didn't have her strength back, and she'd never get it at this rate.

His last resort was to call his mom and have her come. After all, she had 3 boys and she was a woman.

He needed answers he was too deploy in three weeks and he needed/wanted his wife back.


	5. Chapter 5

His mom arrived 2 days later and observed Denise, right away she had her suspicions. She told Frank she needed to go back to her OB immediately, it was likely she was depressed.

"How do you fix it?" That's all he wanted to know.

"That depends on the doctor go make her an appointment."

As he made the appointment he realized he never told her what the doctor said about any more babies. She was far too fragile now, he'd just tell the doctor to keep it quiet, that's what he'd do. He went to the bedroom, "Denise, sweetheart, we're going to see the doctor. Let's get your dressed." She'd done nothing but lie in the bed or walk the baby for days, she didn't dress, he wasn't even sure if she'd bathed.

"No," she said so softly he almost didn't hear her. "Go away please."

"Dee you're going if I have to dress you myself."

He helped her dress and brushed her hair and wiped her face with a cool wash cloth. He was ready to leave and so was she happy or not.

"This will be easier on us both if you come with me," he said. "But if you won't come on your own I'll carry you out of here. I want you to feel better."

Denise looked into his eyes and knew he meant well. So shakily she walked out the door and to the car. She hoped she could feel better to be a better mother and wife because she felt like a failure at both.

She knew going to the doctor was a big step why couldn't she do it on her own.

Frank held her the entire time they waited; he held her to his chest and rocked her. Finally it was their turn and he explained, while shielding her, what had been going on at home. "This isn't Denise," he told the doctor. "This isn't my wife and I can't leave her like this. I have to go in a few weeks but if she's like this...I won't be going. No matter what."

The doctor nodded and took notes, then did a variety of blood tests and physical exam. He explained he would have all the results in a few days. He gave Frank a script for a mild mood elevator until he knew for sure.

Frank sent Denise to sit in the waiting room, "What else can I do for her? I'm helping with the baby but when he calms down for me and not for her it makes her worse. I can't see her like this."

"We will have answers in a few days, but the problem will not go away overnight. It will take time."

Frank shifted in his seat. "How much time? I'm still on duty I can't be home 24/7, should I get help in?"

"Most women in this state don't respond to help in; they see it as compounding their failures. You might try something that only she can fix...try to confide in her maybe...she's feeling like she lost control, and hold off on the other news, it'll be too much."

"Okay, we'll go that way but if she's not better before I deploy maybe her sister who is 2 years younger could come for a visit."

"One thing at a time Sgt. Call me anytime. Expect my call within 2 days."

Frank stood and shook his hand and left. He slid his arm around Denise, she was waiting just outside the door. "Let's go for lunch before we go home. You could use a nice meal and I'm hungry too. Let my mom have her fun."

As they spent the afternoon together Denise felt a bit better. Frank felt she looked a little more energetic. This had to help he wanted her back especially before he deployed.

When they got home Jeremy was doing what he did best, screaming his tiny lungs out. Frank held back, she'd been away from the boy a bit...he waited to see what her instincts would do.

Denise walked slowly to the swing and picked him up cuddling him close kissing his face. His mom walked out of the kitchen with a bottle and stopped short watching. Frank held his hand up to keep Liz back. Denise sat down and let Jeremy latch onto her breast. Could the solution have been this simple?

Jeremy pulled off and fussed a little bit later, "You don't have enough in, honey. You're not eating, you want to nurse him, you need to eat more," Liz said. "I fixed your favorite."

" We ate not long ago I'm not really hungry."

"Not even a taste?"

Frank stepped next to Denise and rubbed Jeremy's back " How about later Mom? She ate a big lunch."

"Sure I'll put this bottle in the fridge."

Denise did eat her dinner than night, Frank felt compelled to try something he knew may pull her out of her shell. He stopped halfway through his supper and squeezed the bridge of his nose. Denies hated it when he wasn't feeling well, she always perked up and took charge then.

She watched him carefully, "What is it Frank?" There was an edge to her voice, of recognition, of action.

"Frank are you okay? Do you hurt?"

There was nothing she hated more than him in pain except perhaps for him to be in tears. He slowly nodded his head, his mother knew better, but given her memory of the first time he had the flu after he met Denise, this just might work. "Headache," he replied. "Light is stinging my eyes."

"Uh, okay, do you want to lie down awhile?"

"Liz could you clean up while I help Fran."

"Sure honey no problem."

Frank stood and Denise walked him to their bedroom.

"You lie down on the bed," she said softly fussing over him. She took off his boots, fluffed his pillows and tucked him in. He felt a little guilty but he needed her to feel better. "Do you want anything for it? I can make ice packs. And don't' worry about Jeremy, I'll take care of him. It's my fault you're sick."

"A cool wash cloth for my head maybe."

She went to the bathroom and got a wet washcloth and towel and put it across his forehead.

"Maybe if you lie next to me and rub my head. It helps the pain go away. She lay next to him on her side lightly rubbing his scalp to relax him. He held her free hand in his squeezing gently letting her know he cared about her.

Denise laid with Frank and hoped she'd soothe him. She changed his cloth and gave him sips of water. You don't have a fever, that's good."

Denise lay with Frank for a while and when he finally fell asleep she went to tend Jeremy. When she got back o bed she snuggled next to Frank and prayed she would get better soon.

She stayed awake all night listening for him, making sure if he needed anything. She'd done this to him and she was going to fix it. When Jeremy started to cry she ran to get him, "No baby, we have to let Daddy sleep. Ssh."

As she rocked him she grew sleepy and fell asleep holding Jeremy. When Frank woke up this is what he saw.

Jeremy was awake kicking his legs and cooing. Frank grabbed a camera and took their picture. "You are so beautiful," he whispered to her. He started the morning coffee. Liz poked her head out, "Did you tell her yet?"

Frank sighed. "No Mom, not yet ,she's not ready to hear it just drop it. Please."

"Not ready to hear what?' Denise said shaking herself awake.

Frank glared at his mother. "Dee the doctor told me after you gave birth ... that you shouldn't have any more babies. You could die. Jeremy is it. I'm sorry baby.

Denise put her hands up to her mouth. "No more babies! Jeremy is it! Oh God! " She started to cry, covering her face in her hands.

"Leave us Mom," Frank said angry that he had to do this. "Leave us be for now." He knelt in front of her. "I love you...whether we have one child or twenty it doesn't matter. All right? We have Jeremy. Let's be happy with that. I am, I love you so much I almost lost you once." He wrapped his arms around her body and hugged her tight. It was then she realized almost died and Jeremy could have.

He held her tight, "Oh my God, he almost died...I almost...Oh Frank I'm sorry," she said sobbing and clinging to his neck. "I'm sorry."

It was then a small break through was accomplished and two days later after talking to the doctor a plan was set in motion for Denise's plan for recovery. By the time Frank deployed Denise was almost back to her old self.

They held each other until the last minute, "You come back to us," Denise told him slipping the letter into his hand. "Jeremy will miss his midnight walks with his Daddy."

Frank kissed the baby and whispered, "Don't forget me little man I'm coming back". He quickly kissed Dee and held her letter in his hand and walked to the bus and leave.

Twenty Years Later

There she was in the hospital 20 years later about to give birth again. Frank isn't here, Jerey isn't here, just my friends, my other family. The doctors had repeatedly assured her the baby girl was fine, not problems. Denise briefly laughed thinking about the poor custodian having to clean the floor in the reception area in Building One.

She heard Frank's voice come into her ear, a swear, so like him. She would have laughed but was in far too much pain. Had it been this hard...oh right, she didn't have to do this part the last time. She focused all her energy and strength on pushing and finally she felt the baby emerge...she held her breathe until..."Aaah. Aaah..." There was no better sound in the world...then a newborn baby's cry and no greater feeling the love and the bond that exists between a woman and the little person that calls her Mommy.


End file.
